Archive | July, 2012

Dark days are u…

28 Jul

Dark days are upon me. The powers of the Satan have reawoken and have left me desolate and afraid. There seems to be no end to the darkness. I stand to lose my loved ones and I am frightened, terrified. I also have to make decisions, and am not sure where anything will lead. I asked God what I should do and received a warning;

And it is certain that if at any time you are turned away from the Lord your God, and go after other gods, to be their servants and to give them worship, destruction will overtake you.

Deuteronomy 8)

But I need to know, oh God, I need to know, if I am making the right decisions and what is guiding me. I want to be with You in everything I do, even if it means making painful sacrifices.

And Jonathan took off the robe he had on and gave it to David, with all his military dress, even to his sword and his bow and the band round his body. (1Samuel 8)
Does this mean I don’t arm myself and fight? Fight for them?
Lord, you have given ear to the prayer of the poor: you will make strong their hearts, you will give them a hearing:
[18] To give decision for the child without a father and for the broken-hearted, so that the man of the earth may no longer be feared.
Again and again, I get the message that I have to trust in him, that he will give wisdom to me, and to my children.

But if you are slow in driving out the people of the land, then those of them who are still there will be like pin-points in your eyes and like thorns in your sides, troubling you in the in the land where you are living (numbers 33)

Now these are the words of the letter which Jeremiah the prophet sent from Jerusalem to the responsible men among those who had been taken away, and to the priests and the prophets and to all the rest of the people whom Nebuchadnezzar had taken away prisoners from Jerusalem to Babylon;
[2] (After Jeconiah the king and the queen-mother and the unsexed servants and the rulers of Judah and Jerusalem and the expert workmen and the metal-workers had gone away from Jerusalem;)
[3] By the hand of Elasah, the son of Shaphan, and Gemariah, the son of Hilkiah, (whom Zedekiah, king of Judah, sent to Babylon, to Nebuchadnezzar, king of Babylon,) saying,
[4] This is what the Lord of armies, the God of Israel, has said to all those whom I have taken away prisoners from Jerusalem to Babylon:
[5] Go on building houses and living in them, and planting gardens and using the fruit of them;
[6] Take wives and have sons and daughters, and take wives for your sons, and give your daughters to husbands, so that they may have sons and daughters; and be increased in number there and do not become less.
[7] And be working for the peace of the land to which I have had you taken away prisoners, and make prayer to the Lord for it: for in its peace you will have peace.
[8] For this is what the Lord of armies, the God of Israel, has said: Do not let yourselves be tricked by the prophets who are among you, and the readers of signs, and give no attention to their dreams which they may have;
[9] For they are saying to you what is false in my name: I have not sent them, says the Lord.
[10] For this is what the Lord has said: When seventy years are ended for Babylon, I will have pity on you and give effect to my good purpose for you, causing you to come back to this place.
[11] For I am conscious of my thoughts about you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you hope at the end.
[12] And you will go on crying to me and making prayer to me, and I will give ear to you.
[13] And you will be searching for me and I will be there, when you have gone after me with all your heart.
I will be near you again, says the Lord, and your fate will be changed, and I will get you together from all the nations and from all the places where I had sent you away, says the Lord; and I will take you back again to the place from which I sent you away prisoners. (Jeremiah 29)


17 Jul

Complaining is easy. ‘Getting by’ and quetching every now and then, while half the time you are resentful and half the time you lie to yourself that ‘it isn’t that bad’ is, whilst uncomfortable, easier than uprooting everything and moving to the unknown. We have such a fear of it, and it’s the fears that stop us becoming who God wants us to be.

Well, I am taking the brave step into the unknown and I thank God for clearing the pathway somewhat. I know that I am taking myself with, along with all my weaknesses, my fears, my egotism, my motherly ego. All that has been packed along with the packing boxes. Here’s hoping that somehow that baggage gets lost upon the way.

I thank God for giving me courage and strength. I thank God for allowing my to break away from my need for approval from others and I thank God for giving me those loved ones who always fill me with strength (you know who you are!). The wicked will continue to try to trip me and grab onto my weaknesses and I hope and pray that one day I will be able to  look them levelly in the eye and say “Do you have a problem with me? Because I most certainly don’t have a problem with myself.”